Day 2

Had a bad sleep, too light and with lots of interruptions. I got a phone call from a friend at 10.30 AM, so the goal of rising at 11 was successful. I did 30 minutes of light therapy, took a shower and a Special K breakfast to rush myself into town to have coffee with this friend. We talked about his life plan and ways to get back my grip.

I had a bad stomach ache the first hours of the day due to bloating and cramping, which hadn't cleared up during sleep like they normally do, probably because of the new sleeping schedule. So it was a painful day. I returned home at 3 PM and grabbed a beer after which I started to clean up my room. It was hard. There were a lot of times I would just stare into the mess without doing anything except sipping from my bottle of Wyborowa.

At some point I started phoning friends to see if I could have dinner with someone. This obviously was a way of avoiding my duty. I couldn't get a dinner with anyone so at 5.30 I made an agreement with myself that I would continue cleaning up until 7. I broke my promise at 6, when I was putting my network utp cable in a box. I realised a friend needed a piece of utp cable for his home. So I cutted of a piece of cable and started putting the connectors on. I drove to his home to hand the present. It turned out he had cooked a simple spaghetti for himself, but it was enough for two. He handed me a plate. I returned home at 7. I thought some more vegetables would be usefull so I bought a salad at the supermarket in addition with a sixpack of Stella Artois. I tried to do the room for another 30 minutes and watched tv from 8 untill now.

Ofcourse the room isn't finished. Yesterday I wrote I would be happy even if I just did some minor cleaning. But although I did spend a few hours at my room, which resulted in open spaces on the floor, I'm not very satisfied. I hope tomorrow I'll have less stomach ache and more energy to devote to this task.

I feel tired now and I'll go to bed soon. I'll set the alarm at 11 AM for tomorrow. Maybe I'll wake up earlier because of the light therapy. But I think 11 AM is a good goal, its 2-3 hours earlier then my normal alarm-time. I shouldn't rush things, let's do this step by step...